We’ve all been there. You give yourself a kick up the backside to finally pay in the cheque that’s been collecting dust on the kitchen table, and you trot off merrily to “la bonk” only to remember that it’s 1.30 and it’s closed. Yeesh!
So now you have two options. Either you hang around muttering “putain de bordel de merde, fait chier!” until it re-opens or you hang a big, fat closed sign around your own neck, wander home and indulge in the laziest of Mediterranean pastimes, the sieste. After all, it’s totally normal to crawl into bed fully clothed halfway through the day. You’ve earnt the right to nap.
Put your phone on mute, chuck on an episode of the dullest French TV programme you can find – Toute une histoire should do it – and give the finger to useless daylight hours. Puh! Who needs 3pm anyway? Winston Churchill claimed that a daily afternoon snooze brought him the clarity of thinking he needed for wartime victory, and researchers in recent years have found that a nap of between 20 and 90 minutes before 4pm not only increases your mental performance, but can also reduce stress, prevent weight gain and boost creativity. That’s good enough for me. And if your job requires you to be fully awake at all times then… hahahahaha!